Sickening-Hand Washing Obsession

It's about that time of year again folks. It's time to get sick and it's impossible to avoid it. Tissues will be in pockets, whether they're clean or not is unclear. Either way, releasing mucus loudly is bound to be everywhere! Coughing will be heard at every corner. It's always surprising how I don't see more lungs laying around. I swear that some people cough up a lung every hour in their prime of sickness (They must have regenerative pairs of lungs!).
So one of the best ways of avoiding these diseases is washing your hands. So when should you wash your hands? According to a paper posted on the restroom stall doors, you should wash your hands before/after you eat, before you touch your face, and after using the bathroom. Then, I thought people should after coughing and after being close to someone that was coughing. So that would result in washing your hands every 2 minutes, not hard at all. Who doesn't have that much time on their hands? (Get it?!? HAHAHA I literally laughed out loud!)
Of course, then you have to know how long to wash your hands for. According to the some poster, you should wash your hands for 20-30 seconds. Have you honestly tried to wash your hands for 30 seconds? I have, it's difficult especially if there are other people around. If you do 30 seconds, three other people have finished washing their hands at the other sink. People probably think I'm obsessed with hand washing.
Then, I always find myself debating on figuring out what is the correct technique of hand washing. Soap first? Or is it a rinsing of my hands before getting the soap? It's such a big deal in my mind! It could mean getting sick or not (maybe). And does the pre-rinsing count in the 30 seconds? Is it suppose to be 30 seconds with the soap on my hands? If so, that will make the entire hand washing process like 45 seconds. This is getting too confusing!
But with all seriousness, be sure you wash your hands well this season! All the time, really! Just imagine that I'm always watching you; it won't be weird at all (Some people even have the courage to leave their hands unwashed even when people are watching though...).